January can be tough—so here are 6 ideas to help

Do you find January tough? If you do, you’re not alone.

The Christmas trees are (probably) down, bills have piled up, the days are still short and dark, and the belt buckle is tighter than you’d like to admit.

Oh, and it’s cold outside… and seasonal affective disorder is real… and the world seems increasingly erratic and unstable…

This podcast episode and blog provides six ideas to help.

Audio and text versions below. Enjoy!

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Audio:

Text:

January can be tough.

I saw a cartoon about December: There was a jolly snowman, beautiful snowfall, and twinkling Christmas lights. Then there was one about January: The snowman was half-melted and crooked; the beautiful snowfall had been replaced with deep freeze chills; and the twinkling lights had been replaced by a mailbox full of credit card bills.

It says something about how many of us feel. Dried up Christmas trees are on the curb, bills have piled up, the days are still short and dark, many New Year’s Resolutions have already gone the way of the Dodo bird, the belt buckle is tighter than we’d like to admit—oh, and its cold outside… and seasonal affective disorder is real… and the world seems increasingly erratic and unstable.

If you think it’s just you, think again. It’s a tough time of year for a lot of people. Psychologist Cliff Arnall says that the third Monday in January is the most depressing day of the year. Perhaps this, along with many of the other reasons already cited, is why we should be proactive—not reactive—about our well-being in January.

Imagine a hole in the ice on a lake. Now imagine falling into it. It is definitely easier to stay out than it is to crawl out. So here are six suggestions to help us stay out. Perhaps a few of them will be useful.

1. Heed reverse inertia

Inertia seems to attract darkness. Sitting on the couch can be good—but not forever. So go for a walk or run, and breathe in some fresh air in the process. Do you remember all those things you’ve heard about mental health being connected to physical health? Yeah, that.

I’m from Canada so there is a lot of snow and ice. I just got my cross-country skis out. I will most certainly fall, but my blood will also most certainly be pumping when I do so. Perhaps you can think of one or two activities that will help you get moving.

2. Embrace Grace

Honestly acknowledge how difficult January tends to be, and remind yourself that it doesn’t last forever.

Don’t beat yourself up when things don’t go as planned (because they probably won’t). And don’t be too harsh with other people either. We need to extend the same grace and understanding to others that we ourselves need.

People aren’t always at their best, including you. Live grace. No one tires of hearing a word of encouragement.

People aren’t always at their best, including you. Live grace. No one tires of hearing a word of encouragement.

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3. Beware the frenemy

Friend + Enemy = Frenemy. Google defines it thusly: “a person with whom one is friendly despite a fundamental dislike or rivalry.” Usually we apply this term to people. But I’d like us to apply it to the internet. In some ways it is our public frenemy number one.

I seriously think we all need to limit our time online—or at least use it a lot more wisely. Sure, we can order a new book and message our best friend. But the online world is increasingly dark and misleading. Doom scrolling, constant comparison to others, rabbit holes that are baited with deceptive half-truths, news that isn’t quite what it seems—and the resultant depression and anxiety from unchecked time online—are all wise warnings to take a step back from the frenemy, whose grip around our hearts is perhaps tighter than we realize.

Social psychologist Ethan Kross from Michigan University said, “We measured lots and lots of other personality and behavioral dimensions… The more you used Facebook, the more your mood dropped.” In an article in The New York Times titled “The Agony of Instagram” Alex Williams says that it is the “highest achievement yet in social-media voyeurism” and “a new form of torture.” Yikes!

It’s not all bad, of course. But the message is ‘proceed with caution.’

Personally, I’ve set up ‘blackout’ times when I don’t go online. I turn off my notifications and have certain times when I put my phone in another room. I’ve talked to a few other people who have done similar things. They never say they regret it.

4. Ask for help

If you’re mentally stuck, reach out for help. Don’t be afraid or embarrassed to do so. Sure, you can wait until you hit rock bottom. But wouldn’t it be less painful if you planned ahead and reached out to someone?

Maybe it’s a professional. Or maybe it’s time with a trusted friend to talk or pray. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).

5. Set a simple reasonable goal

This idea is from my ever-insightful wife, Laura. If a goal is too difficult, we might not attain it in a month when we’re already struggling. If we miss the mark we’ll just have another reason to feel bad. But if it’s reasonable and doable, we’ll be motivated because we know it’s attainable.

Maybe it’s going to bed at a reasonable time. Maybe it’s reading a classic novel instead of watching that TV show that you know is rotting your brain. Maybe it’s about being more consistent with in-person worship. When you have your goal in mind, give it to God for him to use and bless: “Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans” (Proverbs 16:3).

Is there a simple, reasonable goal that could move you forward in a healthy, positive and faithful direction?

6. Stand firm in things eternal

Consider David’s words in Psalm 18:2: “The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”

When you are wobbly, God isn’t. He is the one you want to lean on, learn from, and look to for hope when strong winds blow. If, as it says in 2 Peter 3:8, that with the Lord a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years are like a day, then from God’s perspective January is about 1 second long.

God is all-powerful, all-knowing, and on his throne. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He is at his best even when you aren’t. Root yourself in the Ancient of Days. Worship weekly, pray, read the Bible, take rest seriously, and love your neighbours.

In his book Encounters with Jesus, Tim Keller writes: “Even if right now you are in the midst of sorrow, sip the coming joy.” That’s a good word for January! Stand firm in things eternal.

“Even if right now you are in the midst of sorrow, sip the coming joy.” -Tim Keller

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It can be a tough month. So let’s be proactive, not reactive, about our well-being.

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